My diary

So I am going through a low. I thought I paid the piper but that was a lie I thought I could maintain and get through. See, I thought I could just walk away and I couldn’t. I thought I could be your friend but I couldn’t. It is a constant battle on what happiness means…on what being alive is. I think for so long I took for granted what I had been given… now I see it staring me point blank unflinching. I know I am caught in a cross road of my own making and I wanna give up. It is just not in my blood, yet I need to calm the storm building up within me or I might just ruin a beautiful soul.

Help me, it's like the walls are caving in

Sometimes I feel like giving up

No medicine is strong enough

Someone help me, I'm crawling in my skin

Sometimes I feel like giving up

But I just can't

It isn't in my blood
-Shawn Mendes

'Cause I can't let you lose yourself

Looking for me

And I can't let you make me your, Your everything

I just wanna be an escape

Baby can we escape?

-Kehlani

And I hope I never see the day that you move on and be happy without me

What’s my hand without your heart to hold?

I don’t know what I'm living for If I’m living without you

All my friends, they know and it's true

I don't know who I am without you

I've got it bad, baby

Oh, tell me you love me

I need someone on days like this, I do

-Demi Lovato